jokez

#1 I was stationed on a Navy ship in the Mediterranean , and the 18-to 20-hour workdays passed very slowly . My wife a psychologist,decided to send me a relaxation tape to ease the stress of sea duty Its title: Sounds of the Ocean.

#2" Why did you leave your last job?"
"It was something my boss said."
"What did he say?"
"You're fired!!"

#3 Three rough looking bikers stomp into a truck stop where a grizzled old-timer is having breakfast.One of the bikers extinguishes his cigarette in the old guy's pancakes.The second biker spits a wad of tobacco into his coffee. The third biker dumps the whole plate on the floor.
Without a word of protest, the old guy pays his bill and leaves.
"Not much of a man, was he?"says one of the bikers.
"Not much of a driver either," says the waitress.
"He just backed his truck over three motorcycles."

#4 Every new senior class at our school brings with it a new senior prank. Recently, a group of students let three pigs loose inside the school. They were labeled Pig #1, Pig #2, and Pig #4. School officials quickly rounded up the three pigs but spent the rest of the day looking for Pig#3.

#5 I spent a good part of a recent afternoon stuck on the grocery's express line behind a woman with way too many items. "I'm sorry," she told the clerk. "I guess I forgot to count the things I had in my cart." "Don't worry," the clerk said. "Everyone behind you is counting them."

Good Bands

Gym class heros
ACDC
Fort Minor
Black Tide
Mute math
Limp bizkit
Shelby
Avenged Sevenfold

reviews

saw 5 Saw V was just as good as all the others ones. It does have the same amount of gore. It does start right away with a bang just like all the others. The story was very good in this one as well. It didn't have the best acting but was okay. It wasn't that jumpy or to scary but did have a few scares and jumps. It is a great movie to go see during Haloween. It did have a few boring moments but for the most part keeps you entertained. The movie does go very deep into the story with this one. Some of the games were fun and some were bad. This saw was more like the second one. The ending was led up very well for a great finale. The whole movie was fun though and intense for the most part. Overall would recommend seeing this saw if you have seen all the others.
quarantine-Jay Hernandez, Jennifer Carpenter, and Johnathon Schaech star in this remake of Jaume Balagueró and Paco Plaza's successful, Spanish-language horror film [REC], which follows a television reporter and her cameraman as they fall under a mysterious quarantine issued on an inner-city apartment building. Television reporter Angela Vidal (Carpenter) and her trusty cameraman (Steve Harris) were documenting a night in the life of a Los Angeles fire station crew when the firefighters were summoned to a nearby apartment building to answer a routine 911 call. Upon arriving at the scene, Angela and company discover that police have already arrived to investigate the blood-curdling screams ringing out from one of the apartments. One of the women living in the building has been infected with something terrible, but what? When a few of the other residents are viciously attacked, they try to escape and discover that the CDC has quarantined the building. The officials in charge won't relay any information to those trapped inside the building, and it's impossible to seek information from the outside since telephone, Internet, television, and cell-phone access have all been cut off. By the time the quarantine is lifted, the intrepid cameraman's chilling footage provides the only evidence of the horrors that unfolded on that terrible night. ~